Sunday, August 28, 2011

Mistaken Identity~

So at the end of the school year Jack's nine year old daughter brings home a cup of dirt. Supposedly this cup of dirt contains a sunflower seed. Daughter forgets about this cup of dirt ten minutes after she excitedly tells us all about and runs away. Jack does not.

Being a good dad, Jack waters it every couple days til it sprouts. After a few weeks he transplants it into a little pot and the sprout now takes up residence on the front porch patio table- the same table where Jack and I sit frequently at night and have a conversation that goes something like this:

Me: I don't think that thing is going to flower.

Jack: Maybe it is a late bloomer.

Me: It looks like a weed.

Jack: No matter, I am going to continue to water it daily until, through sheer will and super dad powers, I transform it from a suspicious looking weed into a beautiful sunflower that my daughter grew from her own hands.

Ok, so he didn't say that last part - I inferred it from the look on his face. And the fact that he did continue to water it daily for the last three months, even though it has become glaringly obvious that this thing is not a flower.

Fastforward to present day where I have been walking around with a Kleenex box for the better part of two weeks because of allergies. We are sitting outside at the patio when Jack says, "Look! It flowered!" And indeed it had, except 'flowered' is the wrong word - what it actually was doing was 'seeding'. Daughter's pretty little sunflower is actually.....ragweed. Jack has been harboring and feeding my worst allergin all summer long, right outside the front door. Of course, by this time he has invested way too much time and energy into this devil plant - so even after I showed him identical photos proving it was ragweed.....he continues to water it. While I continue to sneeze. Don't be surprised if Monday while he is at work a huge jungle cat jumps on the porch and eats it - pot and all.


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