Wednesday, May 12, 2010

The Demise of Chet

Ok - so not like his literal demise. I have zero plans to have him whacked by silent men in ill-fitting suits just because he was idiotic enough to not see the exceptional value of yours truly. But the demise of his relevance in our heroine's story.

As this unfolded, my circle of family and friends had such supportive - and strange- reactions. Lola wanted to write Chet a letter explaining the reasons why he and I were logically a good fit - God bless her little brainy heart. My mom called to talk to me and find out how I was doing and, after offering up appropriate heartfelt sentiments, informed me that it was the collective opinion of her household that Chet would see the error of his ways and that I should be nice to him if he came back - everyone makes mistakes. The offerings of wine poured in (haha "poured"? Get it? I crack me up!) from so many people that if I accepted them all then I would spend the next week and a half with the smell of grapes oozing out my pores. I love it all, of course, but have learned a thing or two about breakups and booze.

I am not really going to tell you much dirt about the unraveling of us, sadly. As comforting as it may be to lay out all Chet's flaws and immature behavior in front of you - I had to take a blood oath when I began blogging to use my gift for the betterment of humankind, not evil. (I had to sneak the word 'immature' in there -even though it technically breaks my oath - I am merely human) Also, many of you know Chet's actual identity at this point and that would be mean. Contrary to semi-popular thought (among my ex's and pizza men that take more than 30 minutes to deliver) I am not mean. So here is what I will say....

At this point in time, Chet and I are just not looking for the same thing in a relationship. I learned a ton, about myself and about relationships, from my past. It has left me knowing what I want, knowing what works and what doesn't, knowing what is important to fight for and what is just not worth arguing over...and as much as I wish I could inject those lessons into another human being so he will see my point - that is not possible at this point in science. Chet's past is nothing like mine and has different events that color his view in a completely opposite way - A way that I just feel is unrealistic in the long term.

At the end of the day, a relationship is about building your future. I am not looking to date someone that isn't prepared to build a future with me. I have been there before. I would rather be alone than be with someone that doesn't share my dreams and plans. Especially at this point in my life. I am not saying that what I want is for everyone - there is nothing wrong with Chet's relationship view if you are in your early twenties or if you aren't looking for something more. But that isn't me. So although I am way less than thrilled with the circumstances surrounding our conclusion - waaaaaayyyy less thrilled, I had much higher expectations of behavior for Chet - I think it may be what needed to be done. Everything happens for a reason. Time will tell what this one is~

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