Watch Me Stereotype~

If I had to choose between dating a man that has never been married and a divorced man at this point in my life….the divorced guy always wins. Ok, maybe not always. Not if the divorce is obviously mainly his fault or if he did something awful or if he hasn’t learned a damn thing from it….but otherwise – he wins.

This is not merely because I am trying to rationalize to myself that divorced does not mean broken. On the contrary, I do think divorce means somewhat broken and I want to date someone that understands that without my having to explain it. (Or make him read my blog from start to finish) I can tell amusing stories about my divorce and casually discuss the crazy parts of my marriage and a divorced man can read between the lines and see the reality. I will not need to spell out all the awful. I will not need to bare my soul like he is my own personal therapist – he gets it. If he has been cheated on...even better. Not only does he get that I am broken, but he knows exactly how. If my theory holds water, then we are automatically on the same page from the start.

I also like divorced men for practical reasons. By definition, divorced men have at one time been married – and lived with a woman. I am not going to say that this means they understand women – let’s not go overboard here – but they have realistic expectations of women. They know that our legs are not naturally smooth and silky and that we don’t wake up with perfectly applied makeup. (I usually wake up with raccoon eyes actually, from not washing off mascara at night. I know it is bad and I will regret it one day soon) They appreciate it when you spend the time to make sure your underwear match. They can usually cook and clean to some extent. They know that relationships are mostly work with a little romance instead of lots of romance and very little effort. They listen much more patiently than single men to stories about shopping, hair salons, and fashion. They do not expect you to watch the game and are not overly surprised or annoyed when you gossip through parts of it.

Of course, I am sure that there are exceptions to this rule – like any other rule. There are probably single men out there that are good at the above mentioned things as well. And I am sure there are divorced men out there that suck at the above mentioned things. I don’t blindly follow this rule to the exclusion of good sense. But if I were looking at identical twins that had uttered the exact same words and had the exact same background except one was divorced – and I had to pick one to play with, I would pick the one that was divorced. Should this situation ever occur….I will let you know how my theory holds up.